my feelings flow down like a stream.. It's fast & it hurts.. for better or worse, I'll love you every beat of my heart...

Finally.. the short sem is over for the past... This short sem is very tough for me.. It's a time with lots of success and lots of failure...

My failure of it was being a leader... Bad leader. Assignment wise, OMG.. couldn't get people to attend for group meetings, only few are doing most of the work... But we believe we had done well.. (I hope..)
Another is Noise magazine. I did seriously bad on it. And you know what, the editorial board's picture was not even taken. Due to lack of time, what I did was, take photos from their Facebook & put it in.. And till now, I haven't tell they all yet. I hope they'll forgive me..

Another failure is.. annoyed a girl too much. I don't know why, but I was very emo this whole sem. The relation "feeling" just came to me like that. & what I did was, I annoyed that her too much.. Basically, I was like giving the future planning that, "Oh, we should be .... ~~bla bla bla~~", she explained.. "No no no, you know I'm anti-r all those...." But, I don't know why I kept on asking & asking... I hope she's not fed up of me.. Hehe..  Sorry...

But one miracle thing is that, both of us are still as normal.. Maybe we are used to talking so "openly" or otherwise which I don't know the reason. It's like stirring water, how also it will stay together... So this situation is like, one side was so desperate to have a relation, but the other side was like so desperate not to have a relation. Can you imagine that? It's pulling & pushing but still, we are still together.. (pls, together as in not the couple together, I meant was, still together...)

Explaining to her was hard.. She is the type where you explain one or two words, and she will kind of jump to the conclusion and she will start explaining her verdicts.

What's the big deal then? I then will have to use a lot of words like "No, I meant this ~~~", "I'm just telling you, I'm not hoping an answer or what", "Hey, not like that, it's ~~~", "I'm not trying to make a statement here, I'm just too emo..."... and so on and so fort...

The reason for both of us to always talk about the relationship problem (almost every moment I think...) was not known.. Seriously.. I don't know, I know, I want to start a spark, but I don't know the reason why I keep on annoy her as stated, almost every moment...... Sorry.. And please note, it's not I'm the one always started it, she do sometimes start it too.. Haha. funny right...

She is anti-r, I'm also a little anti-r... Then i tried explaining "my terms" of relationship to her, but I failed... So far what I can explain is something more than a friend and lesser than couple.. Another is, as what we are now, but a little different.. (I don't know what's the difference la.. haha) (I actualy did some research on the types of couple available yesterday... Haha.. too emo too emo...) wait till I can explain myself better first-la, because I still don't know what's the "difference" I wanted...

Few reasons of it...(maybe...)
1. She might have somebody in her list..
2. She is confused of herself..
2.1. I'm confused of myself...
2.2. Both of us are confused of ourselves...
3. The "feel" is not there...
4. I've not done enough to touch her heart..
5... (comment at the bottom...) haha.. (maybe comment on what I should do also okay...)

(Important... to "her", please, I'm also not trying to do anything here, I'm just expressing my feelings only okay?...)

Many more failures... which, I don't want to talk about it la.. (losing weight too...) Shit....!

Success...
MOHE Future Leaders Camp rocks.. Sadly, I didn't bring my camera.. No documentation on it...
Did assignments quite well I suppose...
Networking was very good these few days... Able to talk to people who are a respected person in the society.. Nilai UC people did it quite well ya!

Psst!! tell you all something.. I might go for student exchange... HAHA!!! I'm too happy, but I'm also not hoping too much on it. It's because, I don't know confirm or not, and, I don't know much info about it... So I'll rather keep it a secret first...

I love Nilai UC.. I'll put all my heart & soul into it just like St. Paul's....

You shine & you shine, but make sure that you're the brightest.... Even if it's dim, it's okay, move on to a dark side, the dimmest light would be the brightest that time...

 ~Anonymous, Wong~...

I wonder how many of my mates out there still single like me.. Haha.. I'll wait for her to change her mind...

Signing out, roger and out!!